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Advice to a Trasher

My 2011 New Year's resolution to avoid the judgmentalism that up to now has interfered with daily encountering the beauty of nature has freed me to see trashing positively. I appreciate the effort and offer some tips to enhance satisfaction of your trashing needs.

I can sense the pleasure of opening the window of a running vehicle, lifting the trash gathered and tossing it, dump, plop in one fell swoop. What a release! There's a feeling of accomplishment in getting rid of the stuff, cleaning the car, not having to keep toting it around, and glee in not following the rules and being mischievously self-serving. Taking care of me, I'm number 1, not unknown others. If you have been brought up by family disposers, you might unconsciously trash. You might as well feel the high.

Now, in addition to the "toss it, YAY" mentality, some of us with a little self-restraint, art, and practice are able to maximize and extend the joy of trashing. I've learned these ways on my walks along Scenic Highway 30-A. These photos are from January 16, 2011. Click any image for an enlarged version. Here are some points to consider as you polish your skills and develop trash expertise.

scatter trashFor greater impact, improved accomplishment of trash purpose and for peak visual effect against the natural background, don't release the trash all at once. From a passenger-side window, let individual pieces of trash go at intervals, so as to affect more of the area. This has the additional benefit of allowing a trash picker-upper to bend more frequently, getting more exercise. If you have styrofoam peanuts, plant one every three feet.

bottles and wireslasting toxic trashFor longer trash life and effectiveness, save especially toxic or non-biodegradable items for waterways or hard to reach areas so they may not be easily retrieved. Consider the money saved by discontinuing home garbage service or work item disposal fees if you conveniently let trash fall on the roadside.

truck tire ruttruck turnTruckers, you have the opportunity to not only decorate the landscape with your lunch wraps. To show your destructive power, be sure to drive, turn around, and back up over grass as frequently as possible. Ruts, broken sprinklers, revealed buried cables and cracked pavement are long-lasting testaments to your abilities. Get the recognition that you deserve.

Drinkers, consider not just the occasional beer can, but instead of partying at home, do it in the road and invite your friends. Containers strewn at intervals give insight into your intoxicating revelry and reflect light in patterns of your movements. Perhaps even higher trash points come with throwing a bottle on a hard surface so it shatters shards and litters bordering ground. Imagine the possible bike tires or sandaled runners' feet touched by your distribution forever. No one will be able to recycle or pick up all the slivers of glass. Leave some liquid to further impact the picker-upper's task.

Advertisers, give away as many colorful disposable items as possible. When temporary use is over, each cup, napkin, dish, straw, pen, bag, bill or flyer adorned with your logo has a chance to fly in the wind and reach untold numbers of uninformed clients.

Ay Yi Yi

Deer Lake northIf you are adept in these and disposal methods undreamed of by this observer, kudos. If, however, you have progressed beyond the advanced stage of littering to the point of addiction or denial, there is hope for your recovery. You can return to normal trash methods or cross to the other side and become a picker-upper. Even dedicated trash hounds admit that if no one took responsibility to clear the environment the buildup would eventually encroach upon the road, impede vehicles, and traffic would come to a stop. Trashing must be balanced with untrashing. Such is the yin-yang nature of universal complementarity. Bag it.

This photo of Deer Lake north is my trashing the page as it has no visible trash, is beyond the topic and requires a large download if clicked. However, it is lovely. Enjoy.

See Deer Lake State Park.


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